An Arm Lost or a Stump Gained?

Because arm stumps are gross. 

I was brushing my teeth yesterday and noticed my left arm was still bothering me. I looked down and realized there was nothing left of it besides a bloody stump that ended at the elbow in a jagged open wound. Blood dripped onto the white tiled floor and I thought to myself, “That explains a lot.”

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13 thoughts on “An Arm Lost or a Stump Gained?

  1. That’s the great thing about arms and legs – they grow back.

  2. I rarely respond to people who comment on my numerous Freshly Presses pieces, because I am entirely too busy being famous and doing things like accepting the Pulitzer Prize. But you wrote something about “To the blogger who writes from the point of view of a dog…” and that made no sense to me because I have no canine point of view. So I thought you meant “From…” and I checked you out and read some of your posts. I found no dogs, but you are seriously wacko funny. I like that, and I’m going to post something about your blog this week. Don’t thank me. Just send money. A lot.

    • edrevets says:

      Tons of money coming your way…I’ll just post it in another comment on your blog.

      But seriously thanks so much for the kind words! I try to keep it fresh here even if it’s not always pressed—-I hope you didn’t have to forgo a few Pulitzers on my account for commenting back. Thanks again!

    • edrevets says:

      Don’t you just hate it when that happens??

      • Linda Vernon says:

        I know! It’s almost as annoying as when I’m driving down the road and I have my window open and it get’s really windy in the car and my glass eye pops out onto the freeway. Then I have to make a stop at the glass eye store which is like 50 miles away from where I am. I wish I had a nickel for every time that happened!

  3. Smaktakula says:

    Yikes! As scary as it must’ve been, this dream sounds ‘armless.

    Sorry.

  4. El Guapo says:

    Wait – if it was just a stump then how did you hold the toothbrush with one hand while you squeezed the toothpaste tube with the other?
    Something smells fishy here…

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